I had heard of postpartum depression, but was never prepared for what was in store for me.
For a person who wants to sleep undisturbed once I hit the bed, Reuben made sure I shed that habit within the first 2 weeks. Each time he woke up, he made sure the entire apartment complex knew that through his voice! The first 2 or 3 days, we were fully worried if the baby has some pain or something. then we realized that this guy starts of at the highest frequency possible when he was not happy! He was up every 1 hour or so, which made me finally wonder, "Does this guy ever sleep!". Poor My Mom! She used to walk around the whole house carrying a screaming baby all through the night! We had the house-keeping ladies in the complex visiting us asking why the baby is screaming! We breathed a sigh of relief when we finally reached Trivandrum. There wont be any more apartment complex to wake up.
The postpartum complications that arose, did a hell of a job in keeping us totally occupied with hospital visits all through the first three months. I am thankful to God that these visits were for me and not for the new born.
These initial days were the days when I realized that though now I have got a baby myself, I still am a baby for my parents. I could see the tension in my mother's eyes right from when I said "Mommy I think its time for us to rush to the hospital. I could see the pain reflecting in her face for every small wince right till the moment I finally said "Mommy I am all fine now!. As usual Papa took the strong pillar stand, supporting us all through the difficult times. Though this period was very painful and tiring , we managed to keep our cool and sometimes laugh at our fate, thanks to the greatest support I got from them.
What was more stressful was the doubts and questions. Answering them diplomatically was even more difficult!
There were times when I felt totally depressed and disheartened. What kept me going during all these times was the instant smile I got when I looked at Reuben!

